The Problem With Dating (Apps)

[Listen to an audio version of this blog HERE.]

“My biggest problem,” I told my best friend, “is that dating is exhausting.” We spend time and energy getting to know people who, at any moment, could decide they’re not into it anymore or vice versa. So, what’s the point?

I told her I feel lonely sometimes, but usually not. She said, “that’s normal.”

I told her I feel hurt by rejection even if I’m not that into the person. She said, “that’s normal.”

I told her I feel mean for rejecting someone, even if it’s obviously the best thing to do. She said, “that’s normal, too”

Then she poured me more wine and said, “You either just need to kiss a lot of frogs or kiss nobody.” I don’t especially love the “kiss a lot of frogs” advice because that seems like a waste of time, so I said, “nobody it is!” and we clinked our glasses.

Dating is problematic because the likelihood of meeting someone who wants the same things you at the same time as you seems small at best. I recently met someone online who seemed great. He was smart and sweet. He said all the right things until he said, “I’m not ready for a relationship right now.” My reaction was more or less, “What the fuck?” and then, “Goodbye, forever.”