Stay Hard But Also Stay Soft

[Listen to an audio version of this blog here.]

I had the idea for this blog a few weeks ago when I was running around Sedona, listening to audiobooks and indulging in severe alone time. I re-listened to a section of David Goggin’s book Can’t Hurt Me, which is one of the best memoirs I’ve read to-date. Goggins popularized the phrase “stay hard” and he’s become a popular dude. People want to be like him: athletic, mentally tough, a “savage.” As an ultra endurance athlete, I concur. I do need to stay hard. But there is equal value, I think, in staying soft. Let me explain by trying to identify what soft and hard even mean in the first place:

Let’s start with some definitions, of which there are plenty:

Soft: squishy/not firm or sympathetic/lenient/compassionate, especially to a degree perceived as excessive; not strict or sufficiently strict, or having moderate power or basic or quiet/gentle or soothing or not strong/robust.

Hard: solid/firm/rigid; not easily broken/bent/pierced or difficult or reliable or not showing sympathy/affection; strict or harsh or unpleasant to the senses or relating to great difficulty.

Stay hard: be strong. be mentally tough. don’t give up.

Stay soft: be kind. be empathetic. be compassionate.