Aren’t You Exhausted?

[Listen to an audio version of this blog HERE.]

I received an email last week that my workplace is preparing for civil unrest. What might be causing civil unrest? Nothing more than our presidential election, which, as of this writing, has not yet been decided. Biden is leading but votes in some crucial states, such as Pennsylvania and Wisconsin, are yet to be counted. I stayed up with my roommate to watch election coverage and felt stuck to my couch. Immobile. I am so fucking exhausted.

Aren’t you tired of all the vitriol and constant dogmatism? Aren’t you exhausted by oblique acquaintances arguing on Facebook. You won’t change their minds, by the way, even if you present an airtight argument. Aren’t you tired of trying to change people who will not be changed in a system that has been constructed to cause division? Aren’t you simply, fucking tired? I was at a bar the other week watching a football game, which would be a normal experience at any other time, but now, during COVID, it felt novel. I sat next to an elderly gentleman with a “Keep America Great” Trump 2020 hat. I smiled at him and blithely looked away. I could have felt shocked or annoyed or despair, but I chose to feel nothing. Why? Because feeling nothing is easier than feeling hopeless.

In 2016, I cried all night when Trump won the election. Not because I was personally affected that much…